Wednesday, 30 March 2016

Pillows or Bullets?

I never thought at the age of 33 I would be standing in a chemist totally baffled not knowing what size, soakage, brand etc to buy . . . 
Having previously spoken to a close friend, because believe me this isn't a conversation you can have with just anyone, 'what ones do use, I'm not sure what size I need, I've No idea how to use them?'  I felt confident enough to brave buying a packed and more importantly the right packet. Mini miss looked at me puzzled from the buggy and for a nano second I thought I'd let her choose sure in ten odd years it would be her turn, she may as well be informed.  Nah OK to soon, to soon.  Back to the task in hand I grabbed two boxes non applicator and applicator and maximum soakage, I was taking no changes.  I headed to the till like a pro and placed the items on the counter as if I purchased these every month.
Once I was home the offending items; because believe me the reason I've never attempted to use these things is they scare the bejesus out of me.  I threw them upstairs to be tackled later, much later but not to much later as Auntie Flow was here to say Hi, Oh Goodie!
It's in, no its not in, ah yes it is, it is OK OK, right success I'm going to try and walk now, OK I can feel it, yes I can feel, this is kinda weird I'm not liking this.  For goodness sack women you pushed two babies out this surely should be a breeze 
Clearly not, after an hour I was back to my comfy pillows ahhhh!! Day two; right you little thing your not getting the better of me I'm getting swimming if it's the last things I do.  Oh yes this "experiment" was all so I could go swimming.  After I few messages to previously mentioned friend where we discussed width and insertion methods.  I headed back to the chemist yet again I stood in the same aisle as the day before for a good fifteen minuets weighing up the different products, finally settling on the ones I felt better suited my needs. 
No time for road test; it's in, yup in, feels good still not great but manageable just clinch all will be OK, half way through swim consensuses between myself and friend after quick discussion, I'm not inserting far enough, OK good to know, I'm learning it'll all work out out, goodness the pillows are dame easier to use, but no use for swimming!
Got to say I just love being a women but glad I can laugh about it to  . . .